Welcome to the most must-see Vulture Hound weekly review in history; welcome to… The SmackDown Review

Repetition is often used in a linguistic sense to show emphasis on a certain subject. You know, like how I’m always telling your Mum to clean up after herself… With that in mind this weeks SmackDown Live once again featured a brutal attack on James Ellsworth, physically by AJ Styles, and verbally on commentary by JBL. Savages! There was also a SmackDown Women’s Championship contract signing between Becky Lynch and the no.1 Contender Alexa Bliss. The main event of the night was a tag team match to determine who will face Heath Slater and Rhyno for their SmackDown Tag Team Titles.

The aforementioned contract signing opened the show with Renee Young presiding over Becky and Bliss. Being the mean spirited Heel that she is, Bliss, insulted and chased off Renee. She went on to berate Lynch who in turn called her “Lexi”, much to Bliss’ disliking. After both signed the contract, the Babyface took a shot at Bliss. The lines are blurred guys! They fought a little before Bliss smashed Lynch through the signing table off the top turnbuckle. Renee would catch up with Becky backstage later on in the show whilst she was icing her back – that’s not a euphemism. Renee told the Irish Lass Kicker that Lexi Alexa Bliss has challenged her to a tables match at TLC which Lynch accepted. Almost as if they knew TLC was this Sunday!

A sign of things to come at TLC // wwe.com
A sign of things to come at TLC // wwe.com

In less interesting developments, a team of Dolph Ziggler and Kalisto defeated Baron Corbin and The Miz. Corbin was disqualified after Corbin hitting Kalisto with a chair because, you know, he doesn’t care about anyone? And further re-enforce the caveat of TLC on Sunday.

Carmella for some unknown reason has taken to directing her messages about Nikki Bella towards John Cena. Maybe she thinks Nikki is deaf? Or maybe it could be a way of insulting her without acknowledging her directly? Either way, it’s playground behaviour from the Princess of Staten Island. That message was: at TLC she’s going to hit Nikki Bella with a chair so hard that her “Bella Twins’ will end up on her back. Quite smart, right? Of course, Nikki ran out and proceeded to attack Carmella who eventually scarpered. Season 2 of Total Bellas is coming soon.

The Ambrose Asylum made it’s hotly anticipated return since it was proven inferior to Jericho’s Highlight Reel – Much like the Raw Recap is the lesser of VultureHounds three WWE weekly Reviews. Like he always does, Ambrose made fun of Ellsworth a little but in the way that two pals might insult each other without actually meaning it. He proceeded to lists a bunch of household chores Ellsworth should do to properly give thanks to Ambrose for helping him become an official WWE Superstar (yes, I know). AJ Styles wasn’t taking any of this nonsense and attacked both men. Eventually, Styles gave Ellsworth a Styles Clash from the bottom of the steel steps. At the end of the show AJ Styles interrupted an oddly scheduled interview with Heath Slater and Rhyno backstage. Styles was in turn assaulted from behind by, you guessed it, Dean Ambrose, and the two fought into the end credits.

Tables, Ladders and Chairs would make the Jeremy Kyle show more entertaining // wwe.com
Tables, Ladders and Chairs would make the Jeremy Kyle show more entertaining // wwe.com

In a carbon copy performance of last weeks match Kane defeated Luke Harper which could possibly set up an angle where Harper is banished from the Wyatts and links up with Rowan once again. Kane finished off Harper with a Chokeslam. Straight after this match Bray Wyatt and Randy Orton faced American Alpha in tag team action. Orton hit Gable with a superplex before both men tagged out. The Eater of Viennese Whirls then ran into a box-set of suplexes from Jordan. Then suddenly, the lights went out, and Harper magically appeared at ringside. Bray used the distraction to his advantage and won the match for his deranged family with a Sister Abigail.

"Oh no, it's that homeless looking guy who just lost to 49 year old Kane"... // wwe.com
“Oh no, it’s that homeless looking guy who just lost to 49 year old Kane”… // wwe.com

This means The Wyatts now face Heath Slater and Rhyno at TLC for the SmackDown Tag Team Championships and I’ll be putting Elliot’s mortgage on the Wyatt’s to win.

By Bradley Tiernan

"Wrestling is better than the things you like" - John Oliver

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