Last week, we witnessed some things pretty special in the Impact Zone and, of course, my review reflected that, the Nygma way. Don’t think I will apologize for the strange analogies I did, because I won’t. To be really honest, I’m even very proud of them. We’re 5 weeks away from a major PPV and it’s really time to move on, and not spit on each other’s face.
We’re still in Vegas this week and there’s a lot on the menu. Eli Drake and Eddie Edwards will team up against Fallah Bahh and KM, Willie Mack will square off with Ethan Page, Moose will fight Trey Miguel. Ace Austin is back on the Impact Zone. We’ll also hear from Johnny Impact and Taya Valkyrie after what happened last week. Maybe Killer Kross will have the last word on it, why not… So, no more words, let’s get ready for some action, but your French Enygma Steph way, of course…
The Nygma’s Chart of the Week
- Moose defeated Trey Miguel.
- Backstage, Sami Callihan told Rich Swann that he could have had a family and everything but he turned his back on his one true family. Because of his choices, Callihan promised that he will take everything from him, starting with the X-Division Championship.
- Backstage, Tessa Blanchard said to Melissa Santos that she was just getting started with Gail Kim. After talking to her lawyers, she wanted Impact management to know that she’s calling the shots. She demanded that Gail Kim come to the ring and apologize, and then relinquish her job as an Impact producer.
- Eddie Edwards & Eli Drake defeated Fallah Bahh & KM, thanks to their good boy Kenny.
- Backstage, Willie Mack and Rich Swann were talking about how Callihan and oVe have been harassing them for the past few weeks. Mack assured Swann that he will get Callihan one-on-one, as he promised to take care of oVe tonight. Ethan Page entered and told The Mack that he should be focusing on their match against one another tonight.
- Ace Austin defeated Damian Hyde
- A female wrestler will make her debut, or her comeback, in 2 weeks. May it be Madison Rayne?
Two weeks. #IMPACT
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 23, 2019
- Josh Matthews introduced Impact World Heavyweight & Knockouts Champion, Johnny Impact and Taya Valkyrie. Impact explained why he did what he did, saying that it’s because of internet smart marks. From Day one, he apparently defended the title more frequently than anybody in history. Impact told the fans that all people care about is carnage and him putting his body on the line. He recalled the fans turning on him at Homecoming when Brian Cage nearly defeated him for his title. He mentioned how dumb Brian Cage is, and then talked about how he cannot be loyal to the fans after none of them was loyal to him.
Taya Valkyrie told Matthews that the fans that are “marks” don’t dictate what happens here. Valkyrie said that she will decide when and where women get Knockouts Title shots because they make the rules as the Champions. Johnny said that he is a man of his word and he will give Cage his title shot. Impact said that he will be at Rebellion PPV 100% ready for war with Cage. Johnny went on to tell the fans that all he cares about now are his wife and his World Championship.
- Backstage, Father James Mitchell and Rosemary came face-to-face. Mitchell asked Rosemary if she has realized that she actually lost the war, even if she won the battle. Rosemary asked where Allie’s soul is at. Mitchell implied that she would need to tell “Him” about the problem if she wanted it solved. Whatever this means, Rosemary obliged, saying that she will go to the Undead Realm to talk to “Him”.
- Willie Mack defeated Ethan Page
- Backstage, Killer Kross walked up and starts whispering in Johnny Impact’s ear. As Impact walked away, he said, “Today just keeps getting better and better.” Kross looked unhappy.
- Glenn Gilbertti was drinking at the bar. He bashed Scarlett Bordeaux’s upcoming performance and went into a rant about how the women’s revolution is “ridiculous”. He finished by saying “a woman cannot be the man.”
- Gail Kim was backstage and said that there’s nothing she can do because of Blanchard’s lawyers. Kim said that she’s going to do what she needs to do as she walked away.
- Backstage, LAX and The Lucha Bros were beating one another senseless. Penta hit Ortiz with a water jug while Santana pummeled Fénix with punches. The two teams continued brawling until stagehands arrived and broke them up. Konnan showed up and yelled about how they wanted their rematch and that this is what The Lucha Bros wanted to happen.
- Backstage, Willie Mack was returning from his match with Ethan Page. Suddenly, Jake and Dave Crist sneaked into the room behind him and we heard loud screams coming from within. The Mack actually exited on his own with a steel chair in hand.
- Rich Swann retained the X-Division Championship by defeating Sami Callihan. After the match, Callihan instantly attacked Swann as he was holding his X-Division title belt. Sami grabbed a chair but Swann kicked him and grabbed the chair to use for himself. A masked man entered the ring and seemed impervious to chair shots. Madman Fulton grabbed Swann and hit a massive chokeslam from a laying down position back into the mat. Mack came out and tried to help but he was quickly dropped with the End of Days. With an oVe shirt decked out on him, he held back Swann as Callihan grabbed a bat and rammed it into Swann’s face. Madman Fulton is the newest member of oVe.
The Nygma’s Nutcracker(s) of the Week
– Moose vs. Trey Miguel
Moose provoked The Rascalz last week while their “pot smoking” party. It was expected at least we’ll see him wrestle one of them. And in a kind of David vs Goliath match, things can take an interesting turn…
Trey tried to pick up the pace right away, working into counters, then hit a dropkick on Moose to the floor. Moose cut off the dive and posed, but ate another dropkick. Trey hit two suicide dives, but Moose caught the Tope in mid-air and hits an apron bomb. Trey fought off another buckle bomb and laid in kicks. Another dropkick followed, Moose caught a hurricanrana attempt and slammed Trey into the steps. Back in the ring, Moose laid in strikes, chops, forearms, and then ran into a boot.
Trey went for a hurricanrana but turned it into a Code Red. Moose nearly shrank him with a rolling lariat, took him up top but Trey slipped out and hit a Cheeky Nandos kick. The enzuigiri followed, then the missile dropkick, the step-up tope connected, like the frog splash. Moose then hit the pop-up powerbomb. Trey fired back, hit a superkick and a knee strike. The enzuigiri and a reverse hurricanrana followed. Trey headed up top, Meteora double knees missed, Moose finished him with the spear.
Nice performance from Trey who could have made it, but you don’t teach an old dog new tricks, mostly to Moose…
– The Mack vs. Ethan Page
I may be wrong, but it seems like we already saw these two guys in the ring before. But big guys able to be that agile, for me, are the perfect recipe for a good match.
Page attacked at the bell and laid the boots to Mack. Page follows with elbows, but Mack cut him off with the Samoan drop and a standing moonsault. He then laid in chops but Page powdered. Mack followed with rights and Page laid him out with a kick. Back in the ring, Page grounded things, but Mack fought to his feet and was then knocked down by a running elbow.
Page grounded things again, but Mack fought to his feet again and hit a running boot and an elbow. The atomic drop followed and Mack hit the John Woo double dropkick. The cannonball followed, Mack’s butt nearly shrank Page. The DDT connected and Mack went up top. Page cut him off with a nice iconoclasm and an elbow drop. Mack fought off the spinning Dwayne, they traded kicks until Mack hit the Stunner for the win.
Great match, as I was expecting…
– X-Division Championship match: Rich Swann vs. Sami Callihan
Finally, it’s happening. Callihan was unable to have Swann, he’s now targeting his belt. But don’t expect Sami to relinquish that quickly, I’m pretty sure we’ll have a surprise…
They brawled right away. Swann hit the cutter and followed with a dive. They now brawled on the floor, with Sami laying in chops, but Swann fired back and they fought onto the steps. Sami strangled Swann’s eyes, but Swann fought off the Cactus Driver and Swann dove off the steps and wiped out Sami. They continued to trade strikes, but Sami hit an exploder suplex onto the ramp. After the break, Sami had Swann grounded, stunning him off the ropes. Sami then followed with strikes, spat on his hand and followed with chops, a slam and the neck crank. The elbow drop followed. Sami kept things grounded, but Swann fought to his feet only to be cut off with strikes.
Swann escaped the sleeper, followed with elbows and kicks. He then unloaded strikes and a hurricanrana. Swann fired away with kicks and a hurricanrana. They traded strikes and Sami hit a powerbomb, a knee strike, and a “get out of here”. Sami now picked him up, went for a Cactus Driver, but Swann countered out and they traded kicks. Swann climbed the ropes, and the 450 connected for a 2 and 9/10 count. Swann went up top, got cut off, and they both worked up top. Sami countered the hurricanrana into a superbomb. The crossface followed, Swann fought off and reached the ropes. Sami spat in his face and Swann unloaded more him up with strikes, spat at him (it’s becoming an epidemic in the Impact Zone…) too and hit the springboard cutter. The Phoenix Splash missed, but Swann countered the Cactus Driver into a cradle for the win.
This story is not over, definitely not…
The not-Nygma’s Moment(s) of the Week (or the Nygma’s Broken Record Moment of the Week)
Message for Scarlett Bordeaux: if you’re able to shut up, kick the ass, and nutcrack Glenn Gilbertti next week, I give you a Nygma award every week for the next 3 months… And I know you will…
The Nygma’s Award of the Week
– Ace Austin
Another enhancement match for Ace Austin but look below, does he really need this kind of matches with the talent he has? My crystal ball is saying he has everything to be a future X-Division Champion.
— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) March 23, 2019
– X-Division is the main event
We have been used to having an X-Division match as the opener of the show. This week, it was the main event. Since Day One, the X-Division has been the flagship of Impact Wrestling, every X-D match has the potential to be the main event. This week, Swann and Callihan definitely were the main event.
– Team E&E
Maybe Alisha was right, Eddie and Eli could be the future Tag Team Champions. When I think about that time where Eddie and Eli were the last 2 survivors of a gauntlet match to crown the new Impact World Champion and the matches that followed between the two, I can’t help but think the team of Eddie and Eli can really become serious contenders for the Impact World Tag Team Championships.
– Madman Fulton
Ohio is definitely everything. Some of you would remind of Sawyer Fulton, who was an early member of Sanity stable in NXT. After he was released, Sami Callihan took him under his wings and the Ohio-born wrestler is now oVe and Impact’s newest addition. I have never had any doubt on the fact that Sami Callihan would have a Plan-B, with Swann being reluctant in joining oVe. But I’ve never thought his Plan-B would be a massive and destructive powerhouse.
To be eNYGMAtic…
What to say of this week’s episode… Not bad at all, too much backstage moments but some were in a way necessary to explain the action that took place after in-ring. Because action was there, nothing to say about it.
Then, whether Sami Callihan is a llama, or he revamped the Monty Python’s song from “Sit on my face” into “Spit on my face and tell me that you love me.” If someone still has any doubt on the fact Glenn Gilbertti is a misogynist, and if I failed to explain it, I count on Scarlett Bordeaux to make sure everyone definitely knows. To move forward, you have to get rid of some clichés…
If people think the news of an Impact wrestler signing with another company can be the end of it, here is what I have to say. Since I started to write on Impact nearly 2 years ago, wrestlers have come, wrestlers have left. We may mourn the people that left and stay stuck in the past. Or we can choose to enjoy the present and the future the company has been building.
Think about the wrestlers that are here now, who are writing the history of Impact with their blood and sweat, week after week. Our 2019 motto is moving forward so, if we do it, let’s follow Impact on this way and let’s build together a bright future for the company, with or without some wrestlers…
Next week, we will be “Against All Odds”, with a special event only Impact can do and probably the last big step before Rebellion. On this very high-spirited note, until next week, never EVER forget to stay #eNYGMAtic…
All pics, videos, and screenshots courtesy of Impact Wrestling. Photomontage by @frenchnygma exclusively for @vulturehoundmag and @steelchairmag.