Welcome back to Paradigm pro! No Hook continues its audio-visual delight with another episode of high-impact matches and high calibre oddities. In this episode, we’d see the Interim Midwest Territory Chain holder crowned, Jody defend his VERZUS Battleborn Title against Yoya, Gnarls Garvin take on Alex Kane and more leading to the main event where Billie Starkz defended her newly gained Party Hard Party Monster title against Sandra Moone. Let’s get into the action!

The show opened with a farewell tribute video to the recently passed DK Meadows that showed just a few clips of what he could do and what he stood for. R.I.P. DK Meadows. Then, we got our usual opening and the sounds of someone being attacked. J-Rose stumbled upon this victim and tried to contain the situation. Hardway Heeter had been the victim and instigated a cover-up for the sake of morale.

Midwest Territory Chain Battle Royal: Ken Broadway defeated Austin Connelly, Charlie Kruel, Chris Copeland, Dylan Derringer, Jack Andrews, Jeffrey John, Kayla Kassidy, Nikeem Avent & Xavier Faraday via Sneak Double Elimination

Up first was the Champion Chain Battle Royal. We had a whole host of Paradigm regulars, faces we’d just met, Myron Reed’s young lion Nikeem Avent and the pop tarts obsessed Charlie Kruel made her first appearance of the series. Ken Broadway was nowhere to be seen for introductions so the action started without him. Connelly instantly threw Kassidy out and Avent quickly low-bridged him out of the match too. Fights broke out everywhere and Kruel helped Faraday kick Derringer out. Avent scored another pair of eliminations by throwing Awesome Odyssey’s Copeland & Andrews into each other and out of the match. Kruel tried to share pop tarts with everyone left but Avent wasn’t kind about it and lobbed it back at her. A terrible idea. Faraday and John took out Avent with double Superkicks, then Kruel took those two out with a double dropkick. She tried for a pin but it’s a Battle Royal so this wasn’t counted. John got revenge with a big headbutt and running uppercut before launching Faraday with a Teardrop Suplex. Avent threw him out as he taunted to camera and Faraday teamed up with Kruel to get rid of him. Broadway finally appeared from behind and threw both Faraday and Kruel over the top rope to win the match. He’d played the long game and scored a win without having to do much at all. Smart. Ken Broadway is your interim Midwest Territory Champion Chain holder.

Creature Feature (Adriel Noctis & Lazarus) defeated Flash Thompson & Sam Beale via Bed of Nails on Thompson

Up next was the return of the world’s most glorious perm as Sam Beale returned to the Paradigm Ring alongside his mentor Flash Thompson as they went to war with Creature Feature. Noctis and Lazarus were in for a challenge as Thompson and Beale were definitely the bigger teams, size-wise here. The Permanator himself was the biggest man in the match and after the unfortunate loss to Miles last week. Noctis and Beale started with a technical trade-off and went to the ropes where Beale instantly scored a knockdown with a shoulder tackle. Beale caused a distraction by claiming he was tired and chopped the soul out of a distracted Noctis. He mocked people for believing that, then got suckered into the Creature Feature corner for a kicking neckbreaker. Creature Feature continued to double-team Beale as Lazarus lit him up with jabs. Beale had enough of their BS and ran through both with a double clothesline and elbowed Lazarus as he made a tag to Thompson. Beale and Thompson scored a low dropkick/step-up senton combo on Lazarus and the cocky beatdown continued by both Forgotten Fight Team members. Thompson showed off some solo skill, then brought in Beale for a double-team cannonball. Beale continued the pace with a snapmare running knee and tried to elbow Lazarus down for a pin. He left with a double-team Suplex and Thompson just carried on the beating further. Lazarus tried to fight free from the Forgotten Fight Team corner but they kept him down and dumped him with a double backdrop. Lazarus thought he’d stunned Beale and ran at him but once again, Beale was playing coy and rocked Lazarus with a spinebuster. Lazarus avoided the-Mile-High Club and booted Beale away to finally get the hot tag. Noctis dove in with a springboard clothesline and scored a near-fall with a kick on Thompson. He tried for the Bed of Nails but Lazarus hadn’t recovered and Beale dove onto Noctis with a diving crossbody. Lazarus nearly bit the dust with a double Uranage but Noctis made the save. He took out Beale and the Bed of Nails followed for the win. This was one hell of a tag bout. Beale and Thompson gel incredibly well and gave Lazarus one hell of a beating. I feel it’s a bit unfair now that Beale has had to fight two opponents who don’t die. First Miles, now Lazarus. Either way, bring them all back for future shows, please.

VERZUS Battleborn Title: Jody the Wrestler defeated Yoya via The Invisible People’s Elbow

Next up was Jody the Wrestler and his magic elbow pad in another title defence. He’d bested John last match now he’d have to contend with the Shooterweight, Yoya. Jody feigned sportsmanship as he put on the elbow pad and basically called an audible on a sneak attack. Yoya ducked and booted Jody in the mouth. He went to work on the arm but Jody managed to throw him off. Yoya was shocked by the strength and questioned the pad’s existence, then tried to remove it. He couldn’t, so settled for kicking Jody in the chest. Yoya tried to kick the padded arm and hurt his own foot on the kick. Yoya demanded the pad be checked and the ref found nothing wrong with it. Jody tried to make a joke so Yoya just pummelled him down again and stomped the non-protected arm. He tried for a Cross Armbreaker on the elbow pad arm but still couldn’t bar it. He ran at Jody but got tripped into a leg drop and dropped a mashup of Cena’s and Rock’s taunts for an elbow drop. He used the magic elbow pad for another win, this time using an elbow drop instead of a rolling elbow. Once again, he’d also won incredibly quickly despite being hideously outmatched by his opponent. Just what is the deal with that elbow pad?

Dread King Logan defeated Jay Lyon via Crushing Belly to Belly Suplex

After that was a match featuring everyone’s favourite circus animal, Jay Lyon of the Mane Event in a singles contest against the creator, the destroyer, the Dread King Logan. This would be a very stiff contest as both guys are powerful as hell and Lyon didn’t have Midas Black to calm him down. Lyon started with an athletic rope running sequence and stunned Logan with a roar. He tried to throw away Lyon’s steak but Lyon wouldn’t let him go and tossed him away. Lyon picked the arm and threw Logan again with one of the most athletic rope walking arm-drags I’ve ever seen before taking Logan down with a spinning heel kick. Logan broke free of Lyon’s grasp by raking his mask and avalanched him against the ropes. A discus clothesline followed but when that got two, Logan made Lyon pay with a rope choke and another avalanche attack. The strikes and insults continued as Logan elbowed away at Lyon, knocking the steak away in the process. The pair fought over a Suplex and Lyon scored a surprise pin with a bridging Northern Lights. Logan answered back instantly with a nasty running elbow and dropped the straps for a scoop slam and a running senton. He missed a top rope leg drop and ate Lyon’s elbows and boots on a comeback. He splashed Logan in the corner and nailed him with a handspring enzuigiri. Lyon dropped Logan with the swinging Uranage into the submission but the ref was caught by the spinning and couldn’t see Logan tap. Lyon checked on the ref and Logan used the distraction to twist his mask and take the win with a massive Belly to Belly. Lyon was screwed out of a win here but he put on an amazing performance and Logan won through being a dick. A great little match though.

Alex Kane defeated “Big Beef” Gnarls Garvin via Mark of Kane

Okay, are you scared yet? You should be. It’s time for two monsters to collide. Big Beef was back in singles action against the Suplex Assassin Alex Kane. No one has bested Kane so far in this series, was Garvin about to be the man to do it? The pair battled over lock-ups and shoulder tackles and when Beef tried to cheat the game with a kick, Kane dropped him on his head with a German. Kane continued to manoeuvre around Beef and rocked him with elbows and a corner splash. He rolled Beef into a head kick and ran the ropes for a splash. He threw Beef around with another barrage of Suplexes but Beef countered a follow-up kick into a powerbomb. He continued to pummel Kane and launched him with a Butterfly Suplex. Beef tried to choke out Kane and elbowed him back to the mat when he broke free. He rained down headbutts on Kane and choked him out in the ropes before launching him across the ring for another two. Beef missed off the top rope and was met by a spear from Kane. The straps came down and Kane unleashed another can of Germans on Beef. He tried for a ripcord but Beef answered back with a boot and dumped Kane with a Saito. Beef hit a Coconut Crush and dragged Kane into a short-arm lariat for another two-count. He signalled for the end with the Beefy Bomb but Kane moved and Beef threw himself to the floor. Kane snatched him up through the ropes and took the win with the Mark of Kane. Yet again, Alex Kane went to war and came away the win. Beef took him to his absolute limits but somehow, he found a way to counterattack and end the match with that devastating Mark of Kane. What a fight.

Party Hard Party Monster Title: Sandra Moone defeated Billie Starkz via Moone’s Landing

Last but not least, the main event. Billie Starkz would have her first Party Monster title defence against the master of sub-space Sandra Moone. These two were on friendly terms after fate brought them together last week, would that be the case at the end of this one? The pair started with a test of strength that turned into a hug from Moone. But it was a ruse and she tried for a quick roll-up when Starkz returned the hug. What deviousness. Moone tried to apologise but Starkz returned the favour with a sunset flip and a head kick. Moone dodged the corner kick and pummelled Starkz with corner punches. She went for the Eat My Space Dust but Starkz dodged and blasted her with forearms. Moone kicked out her leg and nailed the Eat My Space Dust bulldog. The pair fought over a Suplex that Starkz won and launched Moone into the turnbuckles. Starkz continued to work the back and delivered a punt kick right to Moone’s ribs. Moone tried to strike back but Starkz drilled her with a rolling elbow. Moone created some separation by kneeing free of a submission hold and a slugfest broke out. Both traded horrendous forearms, then both got downed after kicks and a clothesline. Both found their feet and Moone assaulted Starkz with vicious elbows to the back of the head. She followed up with another lethal clothesline and tried for the Gutwrench Bomb. Both countered and Starkz nailed Moone with a missile dropkick, then scored a two-count with a bridging German. She scored a second near fall with a driver but couldn’t keep Moone down. She slowly climbed to the top for a Swanton but Moone got her knees up and knocked Starkz loopy with another elbow. She crunched Starkz over her knee and ended the match with the Moone’s Landing Bomb. Moone had become a monster during this match and earned herself a new title in the process. It looks like the sub-space division is now also party monsters. Once again, Paradigm booked a match that just radiated main event energy and we ended the episode with that teased hug from earlier. See you next week for more mysterious attacks and hard-hitting matches. Support your favourites and keep asking the questions.

All images courtesy of Paradigm Pro Twitter,ThatRoseTattoo

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