WARNING: STRONG VIOLENCE AND LANGUAGE AHEAD
Welcome back to the Hardcore Hustle. It’s time for another round of good old Subterranean Violence as they too had produced something special for IWTV’s Showcase of the Independents. With this potentially massive new audience watching, they had prepared a super-card from the H2O Wrestling Centre between the rising stars, established veterans, and some new hot figures on the scene. It was going to be the perfect spotlight for H2O to show what they do best, make bloody violence, deathmatch delights, and build up some of the best up-and-comers on the scene. Prepare to be entertained and prepare for war. Let’s get into it.
Reid Walker defeated Adonis Valerio via Tiger Bomb
Up first was the winner of Sean Henderson’s Wrestlecup and all-round hybrid fighter, Reid Walker taking on a new face to me in the Pretty Talented Adonis Valerio. We know what Walker is capable of but just what was Valerio capable of and how badly would he bring the fight? Both guys started cocky and Walker showed some early athleticism. Valerio caught him off-guard and kicked his teeth out. Valerio continued to slowly and methodically beat down Walker, throwing in a hip swivel leg drop until Walker tried to forearm to freedom. Valerio cut this off and Walker found himself receiving even more punishment. Walker used his speed to turn a wheelbarrow hold into a sunset flip and Valerio made him pay with a spinebuster. Valerio got too cocky for his own good and Walker reminded him who he was in there with via nasty kicks into a chain of various Suplexes. Valerio kicked out of a bridging Northern Lights and caught Walker off the ropes into a spike piledriver. He tried for a second rope hang but Walker KO’ed him with a kick and flew with a Springboard Frog Splash. That got two so he ended things with a Tiger Bomb. Walker had put away a very cocky Valerio and taken a win for H2O. Both guys got a good showing and it was a fun little opening contest.
We also got a small spot from the Dignified Administration as Edward Dawkins and Miss Blakely took to the ring to decry the “hardcore crap.” The audience correctly told him to shut the fuck up and announced he was going to pass a bill that would see hardcore gone forever. Ryan Redfield interrupted him and Hawkins ran away, leaving Miss Blakely to deal with Redfield. Blakely did try to fend him off but Redfield sent her and her administration packing.
Six-Man Street Fight: Chris Bradley, GG Everson & Kristian Ross defeated Jeff Cannonball, Myke Quest & Sean Henderson via Roll-up on Henderson
Next up was something more chaotic. A six-man street fight between some of the toughest rising stars and some of H2O’s established stars. This would be one hell of a feather in the cap for the rising stars if they could best Cannonball and Henderson in their element. We didn’t even get the full rendition of Because the Night thanks to the rising stars jumping Henderson and Cannonball. It would have been a 3-on-2 handicap match but Myke Quest came out to even the odds after letting the pair get beaten down a little. What followed was a frantic sprint of six-man action that saw Quest fly, doors get broken and the rising stars really take it to the established stars. Things got hardcore between Quest and Bradley and Cannonball had a cookie sheet barfight with Ross. Everyone was fighting hard as the camera cut to each individual fight going on. It was pure madness. Everson took out all three veterans and Ross dropkicked Quest through a door. Bradley baited Cannonball into a soda review and speared him so hard Diet Coke flew everywhere. Henderson came flying in with a Code Red but Ross kicked him into Bradley’s roll-up for the win. The Rising Stars had fought like hell and taken a big win over three game vets in a bout of total anarchy.
Chuck Payne defeated Deklan Grant via Thumbtack Screwdriver
How do you make your mark on a company? If you’re Deklan Grant you not only win the Heir to Thy Throne tournament, you also step up to not only the biggest man in the company but also the champ Chuck Payne and throw down. This was going to be a scrap. Payne established dominance early on through hard strikes and raw power so Grant bounced him off a ring post and got hardcore. Both guys took sickening wall shots and Grant continued to outsmart Payne. Well until he woke up Payne with a chair shot, earning himself another vicious beating, including not one but two chair shots to the dome. He didn’t stay down so Payne lit him up with chops and put him through that chair with a sidewalk slam. Grant tried to strike back but Payne tanked it and brought him crashing down with a chokeslam. Payne walked off and returned with a bag of tacks, which he dumped into a pile. Grant sensed an opportunity and rocked Payne with Stunners but Payne reversed a charge into a Samoan Drop on the tacks. Grant got his revenge a few seconds later with a powerbomb onto the same tacks. Grant dragged out a table and Devon Moore came out to give his fellow Grimy Bastard a little help positioning Payne on the top. They put Payne through the table with a double superplex and Moore hit a diving elbow. Payne kicked out and took Moore’s head off, then won the match with a Screwdriver into the tacks. This was a riot. Both guys were on top form and even in defeat Grant seemed as invincible as Payne. You’ve got to love a nice monster vs human plunder fest like this.
Devil’s Bull Rope: Drew Blood defeated Marc Angel via Touching the buckles.
The Devil’s Bull Rope was back as two of the company’s veteran stars looked to beat the shit out of each other. Both guys know how to get hardcore and both guys can take a beating. That rope was going to be used to deadly effect here. Oh, they also had barbed-wire turnbuckles too because the normal bull rope stipulation just ain’t enough. Angel played the opening smart and forced Blood to take his gloves off, creating an opportunity to rush him with the cheese-grater attached to the rope. The pair fought to the outside and Blood continued to meet solid metal and fists. Angel woke Blood up with trash talk and Blood took the cheese-grater to him before making the ill-informed decision to headbutt it into Angel. The two returned to the ring and Blood continued to work over Angel with the grater. Angel nearly wrenched Blood’s arm out of its socket and started tapping buckles. Blood used the rope to drag him away from victory and to deliver a nasty kick. Both ate the barbed wire and Angel tripped Blood into the second buckle. He downed Blood with a lariat and went for a pin, which is not allowed here. He hit a second lariat with the rope and began touching buckles again. Angel superplexed Blood from one of the barbed-wire buckles and hurt himself landing on the grater. They slugged it out and both guys got downed again. Blood hit a rope low blow and dragged Angel into a shining wizard. He dumped Angel with a brainbuster and jumped over Angel to tap the final buckle, right as Angel delivered a DVD. This was way more violent than I was expecting and delivered something a bit different.
Mind Games Deathmatch: Marcus Mathers defeated Anthraxx via Head cutting tube double armbar
I don’t really know what a Mind Games deathmatch is. What I do know is it has Marcus Mathers and Anthraxx in so it was going to be very violent and very painful for both involved. Both guys are here to show out and Mathers has been receiving tutelage from one of the best in the game. Time to see how well he can handle more deathmatch. They started technically as Mathers took a near trip into a barbed-wire door. A roll-up later and the pair were battling in a test of strength. A slugfest broke out and Anthraxx put Mathers through the barbed-wire door with a DVD. Anthraxx further cut Mathers up with another tumbleweed of wire and damaged himself with a barbed-wire senton. Mathers escaped a powerbomb and dropped Anthraxx with a German, then dumped Anthrax through a homemade barbed-wire door with an Air Raid Crash. He took it a step further by hanging Anthraxx in the ropes for a barbed-wire backstabber. He followed up with a double jump moonsault but only got two. He set a door up outside and battled Anthraxx on the apron. Anthraxx faceplanted Mathers onto the apron and put him through the door with an apron elbow drop. He rolled Mathers back in and beat him with the broken door. He had tables set up outside and brought Mathers back to life with forearms. Both collapsed and came at each other again with cookie sheets. The pair pulled out some tubes and they duelled, Mathers breaking his tube over Anthraxx’s head and tried for the kip-up Cutter but Anthraxx blasted him with a tube too. He took Mathers to the top for a backdrop but Mathers turned it into a crossbody, dropping Anthraxx through the tables. He kicked Anthraxx down again and made him tap with a light-tube double armbar/head cutting thing. It looked vicious and it won the match. These two definitely went all-in on the deathmatch and gave us the most violent match yet. A lot of fun if a little long.
H2O Hybrid Contenders Ladder match: Dyln McKay defeated Jimmy Lloyd, Alex Stretch, Frankie Pickard & Rocket
The Hybrid Champion has a new owner and now it needs more contenders. How do we settle this quandary? With a five-way ladder match featuring former champs, rising stars, and the newest member of The Hurt Business Jimmy Lloyd. Much like most of this card, the propensity for chaos in this match was off the charts. Who’d come away with that contract and what would be left of them? Fighting broke out everywhere as we got early dives and early brawls between everyone in the match. Stretch proved he was out to do whatever it took to win by dropkicking both Space Cowboys off a ladder and kept the fight going with Rocket, snapping him off a ladder and Lloyd who smashed him onto a ladder with the Assault Driver. McKay broke the internet by hitting a counter Shooting Star Press off the ladder onto Lloyd, well he would have but Lloyd turned that counter into a cutter. The frantic fighting continued everywhere as Lloyd continued to deck everyone. Rocket stopped him and Pickard dumped Stretch through a wooden ladder after Stretch hit him low with Apollo 13. Darian Hardway came out to choke out Rocket in another fuck you act towards Pickard and Pickard ignored the contract to save his partner. McKay had a giant ladder and fought off Lloyd with a destroyer, then climbed to the top and took the contract. McKay had survived the chaos and came away with a six-month open contract at the Hybrid Championship. Mouse had better be ready.
Jimmy Lyon defeated Devon Moore via MD Destroyer
Two deathmatch veterans were in action next, doing what they do best, fucking each other up. Jimmy Lyon has really been showing out lately and Devon Moore is always up for a fight. With no signs of Stockade around, Moore could just let loose and beat on Lyon. Moore pissed Lyon off early by stealing his MD 20/20 and took a water jug to the face. Moore beat Lyon in with a second and cracked it into his balls after about 15 shots to the head. He choked Lyon with a rubber chicken and Lyon sent Moore into the ring post. Moore got another taste of water jug and met concrete as Moore dodged a senton. Moore caught Lyon with a cutter and punched a gusset into Lloyd’s forehead before securing it with a boot. Lyon woke up at the sight of his own blood and cracked Moore in the face with a stop sign, then dropped him on it again with a DDT. Moore kicked out and punched back so Lyon put him through a door with a DVD and ended things with a Destroyer. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Lyon bust out a destroyer before so let’s attribute it to the MD 20/20. This was a nice little sprint to celebrate blood and fuckery before the big main event.
Nolan Edward defeated Austin Luke via Top Rope Glass Pane Drill Bit
Last but not least, our main event. Nolan Edward has been one of the MVPs of both The Collective and the Showcase of the Independents. Now, he was debuting for H2O against one of their best students. Austin Luke. Both guys have a never-say-die attitude and both aren’t afraid of a little blood and plunder. This was going to be epic. Matt Tremont came to commentary to watch as the pair opened with a technical exchange. Both battled for limb control and Edward ended the sequence with a swift leg kick. Edward continued to push the dominance as he took Luke down with a shoulder tackle and broke his comeback with a forearm. He chopped down Luke and slammed him into the buckles. He teased a dive so Luke smashed him in the head with a trashcan lid. He also teased a dive so Edward gave him the trashcan lid treatment. He went to the top and Luke hit a Van-Daminator to a third trashcan lid and sent Edward falling through a door. The pair slugged it out and Edward went wild with kicks. Luke nearly scored the upset with a Regal-Plex and Edward drove him onto a pair of chairs with a Gory Bomb. Luke hit a knee drop as Edward searched for a weapon and covered the ring in tacks. They danced around the tacks and Edward used his wrist tape to choke out Luke. Luke freed himself and dumped Edward into the tacks with a backpack Slam. Edward was force-fed tacks and Luke “kindly” removed them with a ripcord kick but this woke Edward up and he gave Luke a trip to the tacks with a slingshot Blue Thunder Bomb. He lawn-darted Luke into the buckles and smashed his head in with repeated door shots. Luke remained defiant and dumped Edward back in the tacks with a Dragon Suplex into a drive-by trashcan lid dropkick. Edward got the door treatment and Luke snapped his fingers before hitting a trio of Butterfly Suplexes into a cross armbreaker. He refused to quit so Luke dropped him with a brainbuster and went coast to coast with a chair. That still wasn’t enough so a glass pane came out. The pair continued to beat each other down until Luke hit a Tower of London onto the apron. Edward lay dead outside so Luke set up the pane for the killing blow. Edward fought off a superplex attempt and put Luke through the glass pane with a top-rope Drill Bit for the win.
This ended one fucking crazy main event between two hungry, wild talents out to show the world what they can do. The carnie had come to town and he had shown the world a draw. He had shown them someone real and he had left it all covered in blood. Both these guys blew the fucking roof off the place and I honestly hope Edward comes back. He gave a powerful speech to end the show that hopefully, a whole ton of people enjoyed. H2O has earned this spot, this recognition. It had given us deathmatches with purpose, showing off some of the talents it’s making that are almost ready to break out and take over the world and it brought in an outsider who could easily make it a home. H2O should be on everyone’s watchlist and I’m glad IWTV gave it a spot amongst its marathon of madness.
All images courtesy of H2O Twitter, Earl Gardner Photography