Welcome back to No Hook. It’s been a while since J-Rose’s hip-hop-infused wrestling project went off the rails and now it was back for a second season with a business…man also behind the wheel. The season premiere would see a tag team spectacle, Chase Holliday and Jody the Wrestler clash over the Midwest Territory Chain, and Cole Radrick colliding with Nolo Kitano. Anything can happen at No Hook so let’s see what chaos ensued when calls were made and grudges were settled.

WNRN Cyberspace Title/VERZUS Battleborn Championship: Jody Himself defeated Glitch Kai Fayden via Roaring Elbow Duo

J-Rose wanted the big Holliday/Jody title clash to be the main focus of his big season premiere. To warm up for it, he had given both fighters a pick you poison opener. An opponent to soften up the other. Holliday had picked Fayden, who was about to try and kill Jody. Glitch wasn’t quite feeling himself and had to keep stopping between lock-ups. Jody was having fun but Glitch seemed to still be feeling the after-effects of the hack in season 1. Jody took the mocking too far and got drilled by a forearm smash. Jody failed to kip up and asked Glitch for help. Being the gentleman he is, Glitch tried to help and got kneed in the head for it. Glitch dodged the magic elbow pad but Jody elbowed him in the knee out of a fireman’s carry. A deadly duo of roaring elbows followed and Glitch shut down for the three-count. As always, the magic elbow pad had saved Jody and stopped Glitch softening him up for Holliday.

#S4TB (Adriel Noctis, Lazarus & Sandra Moone) defeated Eli Knight, Shawn Kemp & Kayla Kassidy via Moone’s Bed of Nails Landing on Knight

So, opportunities come in Paradigm but they often come with a price. J-Rose had paired Kemp, Knight, and Kassidy with each other and an absent Everett Connors in hopes of them improving alongside each other. If they could get a win by the end of the season, they’d all earn permanent roster spots. The problem was Kassidy and Knight were not interested in working together. Even worse, their first opponents were a proper unit, Creature Feature and Sandra Moone, 3/4 of #S4TB. Knight started strong early on against Lazarus but a bitching session with Kassidy saw him miss a tag and get blasted in the face by a Moone Forearm. Kassidy took her out with a boot and locked in the Camel Clutch. Moone struck back but Kassidy elbowed her down and choked her in the ropes. They struck it out and Moone stunned Kassidy with a back elbow. She looked to run but Kassidy dragged her by the hair into a backbreaker. Moone annihilated her with a backdrop and both tagged out. Noctis came in and took out everyone before focusing fully on legal man Knight. Noctis continued to shoot around the ring destroying everyone until Knight booted to freedom and tagged in Kemp. He destroyed Lazarus with heavy strikes and launched Noctis into his own partner with a back-body cannonball. Sadly, for him, Creature Feature were straight back on him so Kassidy saved him with a double Stunner. Moone killed off Kassidy and Knight killed off Moone with one hell of an impactful combo. Everyone continued to maul each other until this new ragtag team started arguing over a finisher. #S4TB took advantage by hitting the Bed of Nails on Knight and crushing him further as Moone drove Kassidy onto him with Moone’s Landing. The ragtag had tried and their individual skill had served them well but they need to find some cohesion if they’re going to succeed.

Chase Holliday defeated Levi Everett via Beast Fist

It was time for the second pick your poison bout. Most people would assume Jody had no friends to help against Holliday, so it made sense he’d pick someone without the technology to see his antics. He’d picked Levi Everett, the Amish powerhouse. Time to see if he could do a better job than Glitch at softening an opponent. They started with a fist bump and went into a technical exchange. The pair started throwing hands and Holliday slammed Everett into the canvas with a Uranage. Holliday stomped down Everett and weathered more shots to chop Everett in the ropes. The pair went at it like Rockem Sockem Robots and continued to one-up the other until Everett launched Holliday with a Butterfly Suplex. He tried to follow up with the diving headbutt but Holliday dodged and ended him with a lariat into the Beast Fist. This had been more of an open contest than Jody’s but Holliday had managed to come out on top. Neither poison had been lethal but it must have stung to have to fight a former Lost Boy.

Cole Radrick defeated Nolo Kitano via Little Sebastian’s Curse

Time for something completely different. We were about to see discipline meet adrenaline as the Ghetto Samurai clashed with the Wildheart. That’s right, Nolo Kitano was fighting Cole Radrick and it was going to be glorious. Both of these guys are ludicrously innovative in the ring and I couldn’t wait to see them collide. They quickly charged and Kitano sent Radrick flying with a head-scissor takeover. He flew out with a dive and smashed Radrick of the railings, then charged Radrick with double knees. Radrick caught him and positioned him on the top rope. Kitano leapt over Radrick but had his legs taken out with a sweep. He booted Kitano’s arm and took his head off with a back clothesline. Radrick faceplanted Kitano with a twisting slam and the pair fired up off the other’s forearms. He downed Kitano with an enzuigiri and Kitano launched Radrick with another rapid-fire head-scissor. He drilled Radrick with the double knees and spiked him into the mat with an around-the-world DDT. He looked to end Radrick with Trigram’s Rotation but Radrick reversed into Little Sebastian’s Curse for the win. This had been an incredible high-impact sprint with both guys going hell for leather from the starting gun. I need a rematch of this one with more time because they could seriously break the wrestling mould with that.

Midwest Territory Champion Chain: Chase Holliday murdered Jody Himself via Beast Fist Knockout

This was it, the big main event. The poisons had failed and both guys were as strong as they could be. It was time for Holliday to either get his chain back or see it fall into Jody’s hands permanently. Throughout the episode a certain businessman (who sounded a lot like Kerry Awful) had been tinkering with the pair, weakening Jody with pizza and hyping Holliday up ahead of the contest because a Holliday murder spree is just good business. Let’s see if that magic elbow pad could stop a Beast King. Jody tried to put all his titles on the line but Holliday wasn’t having it, this was just for the chain. He knew how that elbow pad required sacrifices and he was not allowing it to happen. Jody tried to bail but Hoodfoot cut off his escape and Chase was a brick wall to bounce off of. He tried to use the elbow pad but it was having no effect on Holliday who ragged up his hoodie and chopped the hell out of Jody before dropping him on his head with a brainbuster. Holliday just mauled Jody with elbows and knees, punishing him for every joke and insult. He tossed him across the ring with an Exploder and tried for a Crucifix Powerbomb but Jody wriggled out the back and smashed Holliday with the magic elbow. Holliday kicked out and unloaded another heavy combo of lariats and bombs. Jody remained defiant and gave Holliday the finger so Holliday knocked him out with FIVE nightmarish Beast Fists. Jody was knocked out and a sadistic Holliday had reclaimed the chain. This wasn’t a match; it was an execution. Jody tried and powered through more than expected but there was only one way this could end. Kerry Awful revealed himself at the end as he argued with J-Rose over what was best for business. Things have kicked off strong and it’s going to be scary to see what comes next. Remember as always, when it comes to No Hook, support your favourites and ask the questions. We’re just getting started here.

All images courtesy of Paradigm, MySkewedView, ThatRoseTattoo, 

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