WARNING: STRONG VIOLENCE AND LANGUAGE AHEAD

Welcome back to DMDU and to a show I know very little about. It turns out some mysteries do still exist in the world of wrestling and DMDU just so happens to be good at it. With only one match announced, Robbie Eagles vs Kid Valiant, the rest of the show was completely up in smoke. However, there was a wealth of talent announced so let’s not delay and see just what this show had to offer.

Aiden Miller defeated Broderick Valentine via Masked Man Attack

Up first was the true love of DMDU, Broderick Valentine. Flanked by Natasha Valentine he was prepared to take on whoever the company was throwing at him. This time, it was Aiden Miller, one hell of a surprise return, who seemed pissed off before the match had even begun. It played out like a fairly standard match with Miller doing everything he could to abuse Valentine. He was very aggressive and made Valentine work for his comeback but it was all for nought as the masked man from the last show struck again, spiking Valentine and giving Miller the win. Miller fled with his win and the masked man dumped Natasha on her head too before unmasking, revealing himself to be the Big Rig FOX. No one is sure what issue he has with Valentine but he made a hell of a comeback here after being absent for quite some time.

Jordan Samson & Chanel Phoenix defeated SGB (Sam Yannis & Levi Nixon) via Armbar on Yannis

Next up was tag action as former foes Chanel Phoenix and Jordan Samson teamed up to take on the Greek Gods SGB. We’d seen Nixon in the last show’s scramble and now, we were going to see him again in his element alongside the debuting Sam Yannis. If there was ever a team you did not want to face, it was Phoenix and Yannis. Despite this being their first outing, they worked incredibly well together and bounced off each other nicely. They both had a power advantage and used it to full effect, intimidating and annihilating SGB when the chance came. They went impervious to damage though and the SGB boys got some good licks in but all it takes is a few moments to lose and that’s what happened as Phoenix locked on that armbar. That’s two wins in a row for Phoenix. She’s gaining steam and hell, if she wants to keep teaming with Samson, they could really scare the competition with their skills.

Scramble: Hector Jones defeated Tom Barrett, Jarvis, Mike Kaos, Jake Wilder & Skylar Cruize via Cut Throat Clutch on Jarvis

It wouldn’t be an indie show without a scramble. Luckily, we had a lot of talent packed into that ring. It was Tom Barrett, a personal favourite of mine taking on Slim Reaper Mike Kaos, Cut-Throat Hector Jones, Wild Boy Jake Wilder, and two new faces in PCW’s Jarvis, someone who hated the crowd and the Influential Skylar Cruize. It was all to play for here. this was great fun and it seemed everyone was having a blast except Jarvis. He was public enemy number one and spent as much time insulting people as he did beating them up. Cruize tried to use her charm to get her foes to fight for her but when that failed, we found she could throw just as heavy a hand as the rest of them. It was all quite manic with everyone looking to get their shit in. As per usual, the slimy fucks of the ADMP cheated to win and Hector Jones got another win through Lochy Hendricks interrupting Kaos’ win. It was a damp end to a very hot match but would you expect anything less of the ADMP?

GORE defeated York via Dominator

BIG BOY FIGHT! Okay, this is a matchup that just gets your heart pounding. GORE and York are two of the biggest men on the roster and they sure do pack a punch. Now, they were being unleashed on each other and the results did not disappoint. This was two men beating the fuck out of each other around the venue. Glasses and beers were sacrificed as these two blew through like a hurricane of horror. Both these guys were having fun cracking skulls and pushing each other to the limit. We saw both pull off ridiculous feats of strength and savagery before GORE got the win with his horrific Dominator. There’s something quite trippy about seeing York handled like a ragdoll.

Deathmatch: Joel Bateman defeated Xavier Black via Salted Bloodfighter Clutch

Time to bring on the violence. It was time for some bloodshed. We had assorted fuckery at the ready as Xavier Black prepared to welcome Joel Bateman back the hard way. He’d been raising hell in the States, even briefly winning the ICW American Deathmatch Title and now it was time to be the Carrie of the homecoming ball. This was fucking brutal. It was a very fast smash and grab deathmatch as Black struck fast and brutalised Bateman with everything to hand. The blood flowed in seconds and by the end, they were both wearing crimson. Black had one hell of a showing and kept using the fuckery like a pro but just couldn’t end Bateman. Because of that, Bateman was able to keep coming back and throw more heavy shots. It was a fun little stiff striking, condiment pouring, glass breaking experience with Bateman winning with the Bloodfighter Clutch in a giant pile of salt and lemons. Post-match, he made a tag team deathmatch where it would be him and Alex Colon vs Callen Butcher and a Mystery partner and called out Charli Evans for Not Here to Fuck Spiders 2. There’s a lot of blood on the horizon.

DMDU Tag Team Titles: Misspent Youth (Aysha & Murdoch) defeated Bobby Bishop & Outback Adam (w/Lucille Brawl) via Double Stomp Driver on Adam

Following that bloodbath, we had the tag team champions in action. Aysha and Murdoch were no strangers to competition but there was some weird tension in the air. Aysha has been a lot angrier lately and has thrown away the sense of fair play in pursuit of victory. Were we going to see that again tonight as they took on the team of Outback Adam and The Cult Classic Bobby Bishop with Lucille Brawl at ringside? Okay, this was fun. Much like Bishop’s last match, it was equal parts serious and silly with Murdoch finding himself on the receiving end of a lot of wild offence and Bishop really showing off his screaming ability. Outback Adam was an absolute gem to watch, employing the services of a daredevil inflatable alligator. That alligator took the biggest bump of the match, diving from the balcony like a madman. However, it was still a title match and once Aysha got going she was hard to stop. Even Brawl got in on the action, joining the fray to be used as a weapon and trying to stop Aysha from using a champagne bottle. They got on the wrong side of Jay Stevens though and Misspent Youth took full advantage of the chaos. It was another dodgy win but hey, it keeps the gold around their waists. Aysha has stopped giving a fuck what people think but Murdoch still seems on the fence about it all. Post-match, Brawl nearly lived up to their name as they seemed ready to tear Aysha’s head off.

The Anti-Deathmatch Open Challenge: Callen Butcher defeated Loverboy Lochy Hendricks via Executioner Elbow

Oh, here we fucking go again. That oh-so-familiar music hit and the ADMP came out once again. This time it was Lochy Hendricks with his stolen “Anti Deathmatch” Title. He was going to give everyone a gift. Not only was he gracing the show with his presence, but he was also holding an open challenge. Now, this was originally going to be a ruse, as Hector Jones rolled out but he was ambushed and Callen Butcher came out to unleash the fucking fury on the smug anti-deathmatch wanker. He had no idea what was coming… but we all did and were ready to relish it. This wasn’t exactly the catharsis you’d want but it was a very thrilling fight. Hendricks is no pussy and he brawled as his life depended on it. The fight opened hot with action spilling everywhere but after a meeting with an exposed buckle, Butcher was bust open and primed for a beating. Hendricks dished one out but could never find the right way to extinguish Butcher’s flame. They beat the shit out of each other for a large portion of the match and after a ref bump, Hendricks tried to cheat to win, hitting low, using the title, and trying to ambush Butcher with Jones. Joel Bateman cut this shit off fast by evening the odds and Butcher came back with an Alabama Slam into that Executioner Elbow. He’d finally gotten that belt back after the dickheads had nicked it and done it under the ADMP’s bullshit rule-set. He hadn’t used a single weapon, just pure brute force, and wrestling. Butcher was back at full power now that he had that gold, just in time for his meeting with Colon nonetheless… Butcher is coming with a point to prove, that he is one of the best deathmatch wrestlers on the planet.

Robbie Eagles defeated Kid Valiant via Ron Miller Special

Last but not least, the main event. Kid Valiant has been rocketing up the DMDU rankings and now it was time to reap the rewards. He was getting the main event spot of the show against one of Australia’s best wrestlers and former IWGP Junior Heavyweight Champion, Robbie Eagles. Was the Sky Lord going to be able to hang with the Sniper of the Skies? Eagles didn’t seem to think so. He did not take Valiant as a threat so Valiant went all out to prove him wrong. He started hot but found out it really wasn’t wise to trade strikes with him. Somehow, mean streak Eagles was scarier than regular Eagles and had Valiant reeling from the viciousness. He knocked him about, broke his leg, and after an absolute belter of a match, finally tapped out his challenger with the Ron Miller Special. It wasn’t quite the night off he’d imagined and Valiant once again stepped up to the challenge. As he said, he was this close, but not close enough. Eagles gave him his props and left him on the floor, content with his victory and the marks Valiant had left on him. it was a worthy main event and a good close to a surprisingly great show. Mystery cards can be very hit or miss but this was pretty much all hits. Valiant has his next goal in mind and that is Royce Chambers at Not Here to Fuck Spiders 2. He has pinned the champ once and now; he wants to do it again with the gold on the line. Will he do it? Only time will tell.

All images courtesy of DMDU, ARegularIndyFan,

Leave a Reply