WARNING: STRONG VIOLENCE AND LANGUAGE AHEAD

Welcome back to H2O and the conclusion of their weekend event. We covered Day 1, Death Wave and now it’s time to delve into the grand event of the weekend, Tremont’s second Deathmatch Tournament, the Tag Team Deathmatch Tournament. There were eight teams all ready to wreck each other for glory. There were multiple threads going into this tournament as we had fan favourite teams clashing with H2O stars linking up clashing with the Killjoys. Tremont was still out to punish Kennedi Copeland and her crew of outcasts for attacking him and the H2O roster out of spite. Alongside the tournament carnage, we had three singles matches, one of which had Mouse! He took on Drew Blood in carpet strip chaos, AKIRA battled Ryan Redfield and Chuck Payne murdered GG Everson under anything goes rules. Who was going to stand tall this time and just how much of them would be left? Let’s get into the carnage and find out.

Scrambled Eggs Deathmatch: The Storm of Entrails (SHLAK & Dan O’Hare) defeated Mitch Vallen & Anthraxx via Absolute Death Double Elbow Drop on Anthraxx

After another fun Tremont opening video, we were live in the H2O Centre for some opening match violence. The first tournament match was going to be a scrambled eggs deathmatch and would see the Storm of Entrails mix it up with the Suplex, Slam, thank you, ma’am team, of Mitch Vallen and Anthraxx. Nice to see we were starting small… So, scrambled eggs referred to the fact that most items in this match were meant to be blasted across someone’s dome. That’s exactly what happened as tack bats and water jugs met skulls and scalps. Throw in some tacks to the arms and shoulders and you had the majority of this match. it was short, sweet, and full of heavy shots and brawling. Just what you want from Storm of Entrails. Anthraxx and Vallen or BDSM as they kept getting called, stepped up to the challenge but it wasn’t quite enough. Storm of Entrails are your first finalist.

Bulldozer’s Barbed Wire Brutality: Chris Bradley & Kristian Ross defeated WTF (Ron Mathis & Tyler Voxx w/Officially Licensed Manager Bruce Grey) via Boss Drop on Voxx

Cue up the Misfits as it was time to get trashy. The second this tournament was announced, everyone knew White Trash Forever was going to be a part of it. This time it would be Ron Mathis and Tyler Voxx repping the group whilst Grey watched from the sidelines. Across the ring from them, were Chris Bradley and Kristian Ross, the first delegation of Copeland’s Empire. Tremont had set them a challenging team to start with and a nasty wire-filled stipulation to battle under. So, props to them, this was an evenly-matched, wired-up war. Both teams got their big shots in with Bruce Grey and Mouse working to help their teams number-wise. There was a lot of cutting and carving with Voxx having no shakiness despite this being his first real deathmatch. Ross and Bradley advance but they’d had a much harder time with WTF than they’d first anticipated with Bradley almost taking the L twice to Mathis. Once after a barbed-wire piledriver and once after Ronnie the Shooter tried to choke him out. it wasn’t to be and there was always a means to break the pin or hold and after Mouse and Grey were taken out, it was up to Ross and Bradley to end Voxx with a double-team into a barbed-wire board. The 1st of Copeland’s envoys have made it to the finals. Lotta fun in this one, I know we’re supposed to hate them but I can’t stop rooting for Ross and Bradley.

Unclassified Round 1 Death: Deklan Grant & Jess Moss defeated Lowlife Louie & Bam Sullivan via Glass Pit double Side Effect on Louie

The champ was here as the grimiest couple in the game looked to add more gold to the trophy cabinet. Deklan Grant already holds the top belt in the company but now he and Jess Moss were looking to add another tournament trophy to the list too. They weren’t getting an easy road to the finals either as their foes were ready to clutch their nuts and chug Four Lokos. They had drawn Bam Sullivan and Lowlife Louie in a pure death fest. Damn this was a belter. These four pummelled the ever-loving fuck out of each other. The fuckery came second to the continuous forearms, headbutts, and slaps the two teams were destroying each other with. Don’t get me wrong, there was plenty of fuckery too. Between a wired rope section, deadly stuffed animals on sticks, and forks going where no fork has gone before, this match managed to have it all. Bam and Louie had great tag team chemistry and I had fun watching Moss try to kill everyone. She gave zero fucks as she slapped around her foes until inevitably eating shit as Bam powerslammed her through a barbed-wire board. Despite all this, the grimy couple flourished and bested Louie’s hulking up to end the match by dumping him in a glass pit. The champ and his missus are your third finalists.

Full Metal Mayhem: Dyln McKay & Lucky 13 defeated Kennedi Copeland & Austin Luke via Dragon Stomp on Luke

The last match of the opening tournament round was going to be a clanger for sure. Not in a quality sense but in the sense, that we were going to hear the clang of twisted metal as the two teams assaulted each other with metal objects. It would be the flying force of Dyln McKay and Lucky 13 battling Kennedi Copeland and Austin Luke under Full Metal Mayhem rules. Copeland won the first Tremont Deathmatch Tournament and was definitely looking to get back-to-back wins. Since Luke was her partner, she had quite a good chance of doing so. So how do I sum this match up? The short way, ouch. The long way, fucking ouch that looked rough. The problem with metal is that it is highly unforgiving and everyone in this match felt the sting of it on multiple occasions. This one may not have been the bloodiest but it certainly looked like it hurt the most as everyone’s backs met ladders or chairs in the worst ways. Copeland had not one but two devastating landings on a ladder at the hands of McKay and Luke had multiple chairs mangled by his body. That’s not to say the pair didn’t fight back. They most certainly did with Luke relying heavily on his kicking ability whilst Copeland picked her moments to deliver the nastiest impact from her hybrid-style offence. It was another excellent match punctuated by some absolutely shocking landings. Remind me never to piss off an H2O crowd, they will constantly chant for your demise. That’s definitely the reception Copeland got here.

Carpet Strip Chaos: Mouse defeated Drew Blood via Head Drop

We took a break from tournament action to enjoy a series of singles bouts. Kicking this off was the final member of Copeland’s band of outcasts who’d already made his presence felt tonight, Mouse. He was the only one not in the tournament but Tremont hadn’t forgotten about him. He was getting Drew Blood in a carpet strip chaos match. Mouse went right on the attack with a contraption of chicken wire and strips, twatting Blood down from the top. What followed was a nasty exchange of stiff shots, strips snapping, and a lot of stabbing. It was a nasty combination of fuckery-based bludgeoning and the exceptional wrestling both guys are capable of. Blood ate shit throughout the match as Mouse found more and more creative ways to smash chairs with his body. Seeing Mouse use a Shiranui to propel himself over a chair and dump Blood through it was fucking awesome. It wouldn’t be a killjoy match without interference and Copeland made sure her stablemate won by distracting Blood when he had Mouse where he wanted him. That couldn’t put a damper on this one though as both guys had gone through hell before the inevitable interference. Blood put in one hell of an effort but the numbers were against him and Mouse had brought an extra level of sadism with him for this one. I enjoyed this one and I think most other people watching did too.

Anything Goes: Chuck Payne defeated GG Everson via Lariat

I hope the ring was reinforced because we had two kaiju coming through. Following the two-on-one match at the last show, Payne was pissed and wanted to make GG Everson suffer. Now, the monster had his chance to murder Everson in a match with no rules and no help. This could get very ugly. It definitely did. It turns out the deathmatch part of this was Payne trying to kill Everson. He stalled him out and then bludgeoned him with whatever he could find. To Everson’s credit, he didn’t take this lying down and continuously found ways to get the better of Payne, throwing him through chairs and bringing out the first bundles of the show. It was another vicious fight with Everson showing a lot of heart and determination but he just couldn’t keep Payne down, regardless of how many signs or tubes he hit him with. He even popped up at one after Payne hit him with a bundle-breaking Alabama Slam but that adrenaline quickly died out as Payne decapitated him with a lariat. It made for a nice spectacle and another great showing for Everson but the real takeaway is still how deadly Chuck Payne is.

AKIRA defeated Ryan Redfield via Dragon Tombstone

Turns out Ryan Redfield had a bit of extracurricular activity to take care of before this one. The “president” Edward Hawkins tried to take the show hostage so he could spew more anti-deathmatch bullshit so Redfield came out and knocked him out before his match could begin. This was the only pure match of the night so you just knew Redfield and AKIRA were going to try and make it special. So, this was a physical one for sure. When you start off the match just trying to smack the shit out of each other, it sets a tone. AKIRA was more than happy to trade chops and kick the soul out of Big Red. It worked well and he was able to keep Redfield grounded and hurt for a lot of this. It was another cerebral match as the Death Samurai showed off the wealth of holds, kicks, and counters he could pull out of his bag at any moment. Redfield was continuously on the defensive, finally getting those heavy shots and killing blows in after absorbing a whole lot of punishment. Despite his singlet giving him trouble, he was able to navigate the waters of AKIRA and almost pull out a win. Unfortunately for him, AKIRA barely knows the word quit and just kept swarming, putting Big Red down with a Tombstone variant of the Death Penalty. This made for a nice change of pace as these two put on a technical masterclass. Redfield has been blowing me away lately with how he handles opponents with more tools and experience than him. He gave AKIRA everything and, in the end, got AKIRA’s respect for it.

Tournament Final Survive or Suffer Light-Tube Deathmatch: Chris Bradley & Kristian Ross defeated Dyln McKay & Lucky 13, Storm of Entrails & Jess Moss & Deklan Grant via Super Bundle From the Heavens on O’Hare

Last but not least, the main event. It was tube time as the ring was littered with the glass implements of death. Four teams were going to enter the mess but only one would be left standing when the spooky dust settled. It would be Storm of Entrails vs Ross and Bradley vs McKay and 13 vs Grant and Moss to crown the first winner of Tremont’s Tag Team Deathmatch Tournament. It would be insanity vs grime vs hoss horror vs high-flying with Lowlife Louie joining commentary for the clusterfuck. Even Edward Hawkins’ feeble attempts to stop this one had failed as Tremont dealt with him personally. He was even going to ref this one. 13 was coming in with a limp after his first-round war and everyone pretty much got to breaking the tubes once everybody was in the ring. After several minutes of pure anarchy, where everyone glassed each other, it was SHLAK who got the first elimination working with 13 to powerbomb Jess to hell. Her team was out and everyone else kept swinging. Ross and Bradley got the second elimination as they started to focus on McKay after he cut Ross up with a bundle Pele. After a slam to a bundle chair and Ross’s deadly Piledriver, McKay stayed down and we were left with two teams. That didn’t stop SHLAK from finishing the glassing he was giving 13 as the three-count was administered, why waste good glass? That left the two teams with history. Ross and Bradley have never beaten Storm of Entrails. Both of their bouts have been too chaotic to control and end in no contests. Now, we’d finally get a winner.

As you’d expect, those two continued to shred each other limb from limb. It was another continuous hurricane of broken glass and creative fuckery. Ross and Bradley continued to bring the fight to the deathmatch veterans and eventually got the better of them with a monstrous From the Heavens splash off a ladder onto a super bundle and Dan O’Hare. It was the ultimate killer to an unkillable team. Ross and Bradley had won. They had survived four other teams and a whole host of glass to the body and come out the other side with new trophies. They were gracious winners, pulling the generic winner pose until Mouse came out and glassed Tremont, starting another beat down on the boss. Chondo came out brandishing the weedwhacker and scared most of them off but Bradley had been too slow to leave. Tremont trapped him and Chondo swiped him with the Weedwhacker. They then laid down the gauntlet, challenging Ross and Bradley to a Fans Bring The Weapons match at the Sixth Anniversary show. congratulations Ross and Bradley, you were the better team today and proved just how hardcore you can get. Regardless of their attitude, they have the skills to back it up and have just gained another massive accolade. Though, they may have to be mailed their trophies as they kind of left them behind when they fled…

All images courtesy of H2O